Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Mystery on Bronwen Court

Something is amiss at my house.

And, that thing would be my leggings. 

I probably wear leggings, or some variety of them, four days a week.  I love the feel of them and wear them year round.  I just change from full length to capri in the summertime.  I have about 500 pairs of black leggings, and yet I go through them like water.  I have ONE pair of brown, and they happen to be my favorite.  They are the perfect color of brown, not too dark, not too light.  Chocolate brown.  Pretty brown.

And now, they're missing. 

I've looked everywhere for them.  Pajama drawer, pajama stack on the shelf in the closet (yes, I have a lot of pajama pants), regular pants stack, leggings drawer, exercise pants (HA!) stack.  They are nowhere to be found.  I haven't traveled anywhere with them, so they aren't staying with friends or anything.

(By the way, I do NOT look like this in my leggings.  For one thing, my stomach is FLATTER than this gal's (NOT) and I don't try to pull that pose.)

This morning, I went to dress and discovered that yet ANOTHER pair is missing.  The leggings I was looking for this morning have only been worn once.   They don't yet have that ugly worn sheen to them.  They were comfortable and lightweight.    And now they're gone.  

Did Brownie and Blackie Capri run away together?  Is there a legging thief?  Is Steven wearing them without me knowing?  Are the animals having a dress up party?

I'm going to have to start putting tracking devices on these things.

Monday, February 27, 2012

I didn't watch the Oscars, and more useless information

I didn't watch the Oscars last night.  I'm not even sure I saw any of the nominated movies.  I read The Help, but haven't seen it..  I imagine I'll see some of the movies before my life is over, but I bet I don't see all of them.

I do like looking at what the ladies wear.  I thought Octavia Spencer looked really pretty.  I think she might be my favorite person in a movie that I didn't see.  I can't imagine the work it takes to look so pretty.  I wonder if any of those ladies leak a little bit when they sneeze or cough?

I also loved this dress.  How darn cute is Selena Gomez?

My last comment on the Oscars:  Angelina Jolie needs to eat a sandwich.  Or two.

A few updates:

Since I made my Hobo Bag?  I haven't seen anyone to give it to. 

My nose blowing is going a tad bit better, but it's still not right.  I really appreciate all the good advice.  Cyber world really has all the answers.

 No sign of Owl Girl for quite awhile now.

Corey, the fish, is still alive and swimming!  (Knock on Wood!)

Going back to see Dave Matthews this summer.  He and I took a break from each other for a year.  We're ready to reunite in May.

Let's check the countdown clock to Seattle:  46 days

It's a Leap Year.  No Sadie Hawkins dances for me.  Did you ever have those?

We had many a dance in the West Junior High School gymnasium.  I did the hustle to "Philadelphia Freedom."  Those two really didn't go together.  Best slow dance song?  Always and Forever by Heatwave.  The L O N G version.

Let's end with something fun.  Remember Big Valley?  Oh man, I loved Heath.

 It's probably why I love a Heath bar to this day....

Saturday, February 25, 2012

It's nice to be nice to the nice

I do love my grocery store.  Well, I guess I should say I really like all the people who work there.  They are so darn nice.  I've been going there for years and years and everyone there is so friendly. 

No matter what the time of day is, the checkout folks and baggers are so kind.  They ask me if I found everything okay, they ask me about plastic or paper, and then proceed to pack my groceries with care.  They gently hand me my receipt and always thank me and wish me a happy day.

They always offer to walk my cart out to the car. I always decline.  I'm not at the point in my life where I need or want this service.  Yet.

I think that I'm starting to tick off some of the baggers.  They've started to try to talk me into letting them take the cart.  They're using lines like, "I'm going out to get the carts anyway..." or "I don't mind."  So, then I have to tell them, again, that I'm not interested in this service. 

  It starts to feel like a bit of a standoff.  NO!  I don't want this.  YES!  You must have it!  NO!  I can get my own groceries to the car! YES!  Old woman, I want to get outside and get some fresh air!  NO!  I don't want to make small talk all the way to the car!  YES!  I need a break from bagging all this stupid food!  NO NO NO!  And, I run out the store pushing my cart at warp speed.

Today, I didn't let Kyle take my cart to the car.  We had the standoff, and I walked away victorious. 

As I pushed my own cart to the car, I didn't feel so  nice.  They'd never hire me at Publix.

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Fresh Fish

I’m almost 50 years old.  I have a college degree, and I don’t consider myself to be too naive in the ways of the world. 

But yesterday?  I was “had.” 

I was at work and received a call from an agent with the Drug Enforcement Agency.  Agent John Gilmore proceeded to give me his name, my case number and informed me that my name was linked to illegal drug purchases from the Dominican Republic.

[cue diarrhea]


Yes, that was my response.  I felt my face flush and armpits sweat.  Agent Gilmore went on to tell me that I had two choices of action.  He then mumbled words like, “felony,” “bench warrant” and “imminent arrest” to me.  He asked if I had ever ordered drugs on line.  “Of course I have, it’s cheaper with my insurance to do it 90 days at a time,” I responded.  I kept mentioning my insurance, UnitedHealthcare, 90 days, legitimate prescription, Lexapro.   I'm sure I sounded like a guilty woman.  He continued to scare me and then transferred me to Border Patrol. 


The gentleman at Border Patrol (who sounded A LOT like Agent Gilmore) then proceeded to tell me my fine was $2800.  Now, I don't know about you, but I don't keep $2800 for fines in my back pocket.  He continued that if I paid that, all would be well, the charges would be dropped.  I would be a free woman.


Finally, at this point, a warning bell went off in my head.  Something wasn’t right.  Something was fishy.  the jig was up.  A co-worker of mine, who was in the same room with me during this freaky event,  had been looking on line and discovered it was a scam.  That gave me the courage to tell AGENT GILMORE or the BORDER PATROL MAN that I would have my attorney call him.  (Remember, I work at a LAW FIRM) He fumbled around and mentioned arrest and felony to me again, but I didn’t cave.   I hung up the phone.

I then proceeded to read, for an hour, tales of this scam and how very many people have been affected by it.   I felt a bit better; I mean, when someone identifies themselves to me as a member of the DEA, who am I to question it?  I knew I was innocent, but for a few moments, this guy had me believing I had broken some kind of mysterious international law, and was prepared to pay a fine.  I still feel a bit sick to my stomach about it all, and am amazed at how easily I was manipulated.

And I call myself not stoopid.

I’d buckle under interrogation.

Don’t pick me for your team.

I’d look awful in horizontal stripes.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Monday, February 20, 2012

Monday Catch Up Following a Rainy Weekend in Auburn, Alabama

Happy Monday!

The husband and I went on a 33 hour road trip this weekend.  The best part about road trips?  GREAT Blog Fodder.

We traveled to Auburn, Alabama to watch the Missouri Tigers v. Auburn Tigers baseball. (Reminder--brother is the head coach at Missouri)   It was the first weekend of college baseball all around the country.  We decided to go over Saturday, so as not to have to miss work on Friday; this would allow us to see the Saturday game and part of the Sunday game before returning home.  It was a great plan until Mother Nature intervened.

We had just passed Crawfordville, Georgia (where I enjoyed my DQ Dip Cone!) when my brother texted me that the game was canceled for the day, they would play a doubleheader on Sunday.  Huh.  Well, that sucked.  But, what to do?  Our hotel room was paid for, and Taylor was already in Auburn. Plus, I wanted to see my brother. So, we forged on down I-20.

We stayed at a real live motel, you know, the kind with the doors on the outside.  Motels always remind me of my grandparents. They loved a motel.  They would always bring along their travel bar.  It looked something like this:

We didn't have a travel bar, but we do always travel with a cooler.

I digress.

While driving, we listened to "Unbroken."  It's a wonderful story of Louie Zamperini, and his experience as an Olympic Athlete, Air Force Bombardier, and POW in World War II. I highly recommend it!   Listening to audio books is probably one of my favorite parts of traveling.

We had a great dinner at an Italian restaurant called, "Ma Fia's."  Get it?  My brother was chatty, which happens about as often as Haley's Comet.  The food and company were excellent.

A Half Order of Mushroom Ravioli was too small for the Ju. I'm a full order kind of gal.

A baseball stadium is either the hottest or coldest place on the planet.  On this day, it was cold and wet.  The seats were wet and the wind was blowing, not what I call good baseball weather.  But, it was good to be watching the Tigers  (Missouri variety) with Taylor, Steven and HAD.

The best part?  The good Tigers won.  Both games of the Sunday doubleheader.  We were only able to stay for the first game, as we had that 6 and 1/2 hour drive back home.  But, it was worth it, rain and all.  These baseball games bring our family together, even if only for 33 hours at a time.

Thanks for driving Dear!

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Monday, February 13, 2012

Valentine's Day 2012

 Oh, here we go again, it's time for Valentine's Day and all the sugar and spice that goes with it!  How did you like our opener?  Please tell me that you noticed his heart shaped mustache? 

I've read and re-read this one a few times and each time I'm getting more disturbed.  I can't figure out if this is a young looking old guy or an old looking young guy?  Either way, he's creepy.  I'm not sure about his reference to light and dark either?   I'm just having a hard time imagining him snagging a Valentine this year.


 Awww.  This just warms me to the cockles of my heart.  They're being so safe and not sharing their nits.

Hm.  Lucy and Desi.  Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward.  Spencer Tracy and Katherine Hepburn.  And, now we have Human Head on a Turtle.  By the way,  is that Jesus on that turtle?

I may be grasping at straws here, but I'm thinking the guy who sent this Valentine isn't getting any.  Any time soon.

And finally, a nice classic Valentine with flowers and Cupid.  And something attached to Cupid's crotch.  Hey, I don't design em folks.  I just find em!

Happy Valentine's Day with loads of LOVE!

Sunday, February 12, 2012


Why do we have visitations/wakes when people die? 

Well, let me rephrase that. Why do we do them the way we do?

All my life, with all my loved ones and all my friends, there has been a visitation one night and the funeral/burial the following day.  At the visitation, usually there is an open casket placed on one end of the room.  Flowers surround the casket.  Chairs, tables and Kleenex make up the remainder of the room.  There is usually some bad music piped into the room.  Friends and family come to pay their respects.  Some people view the body, some don't.  Most stand as far away from the casket as humanly possible while still remaining respectable.  Stories are told, condolences are shared and that horrible awkward couple of hours ends with everyone feeling drained.

I sure wish there was another way to do it.  Death sucks.  Hands down.  So, I know it's a sucky time, plain and simple.  But, isn't there something else we could do to honor our loved ones, celebrate their lives and, if you believe, rejoice over  their homecoming to a higher being? 

I read an obituary the other day, and it said there would be no funeral, but friends were encouraged to meet at the families house.  I had never read anything like this, but haven't stopped thinking about it.  I like the idea of bucking convention in this manner.  I told Steven and Taylor that when I die, just cremate me and have someone give me a final blessing.  No funeral homes.  No bad makeup.  No dead body sitting in the room making everyone else feel like absolute crap. Put up some of the more flattering pictures of me and play all my favorite tunes.   Just get some finger food, lots of beer and have a great time telling stories about how great I was.  Find solace in each other, be sad if you must, but then be happy again. 

I know there are many psychological studies out there about the way we do it and why it's necessary to help us heal.  I get that.  I certainly can't speak for everyone, only myself.  But, please don't put JuJu in the corner. 

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Yet Another Blog Idea Stolen From Angie

My blogging buddy, Angie (please visit her here) manages to find some great blog lists.  And, I always borrow/copy/steal them.  She knows I will do this, and I hope she understands that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery??

And thus, we have the ABC's of JuJuBee:

A. Age: 48.  Going on 18.

B. Bed size: King.   I'm a bed snob.  If I end up in a smallerthanking size bed at a hotel, I roll my eyes. 

C. Chore that you hate: Mopping the floor or paying the bills.  Both are equally depressing.

D. Dogs: We have the most spoiled dog on the planet, aka Rockett Dog.  As we speak,she is sitting on the couch with me, curled up in a little ball of fur.

E. Essential start to your day: Unsweet Iced Tea. 

F. Favorite color:   This is something that changes, depending on my phase of life.  Currently, I'm in my red period. 

G. Gold or Silver: Silver

H. Height: 5'3" and3/4".  And shrinking.

I. Instruments you play: Piano, Flute and Piccolo. 

J. Job title: Director of Operations.  Or, as I like to say,  "DOO."  And you know what rhymes with DOO, right?

K. Kids: Two, Jake and Taylor.  Three if you include Steven.

L. Live: Goose Creek, SC.  (just outside of Charleston) 

M. Mother’s name: Rosalie Marie Cottingham Jamieson.  AKA Suzy. 

N. Nicknames: JuJu  (Thanks Aiden!)

O. Overnight hospital stays: Two.  Knock on wood here---only with birthing the babies.

P. Pet peeves: Prejudice of any kind.

Q. Quote from a movie: "Get busy living, or get busy dying."

R. Right or left handed: Right

S. Siblings: Two OLDER brothers, Jeff and Tim. 

(what happened to T??)

U. Ultimate Vacation: Within driving distance:  mountains of NC. Faraway?  Italy

V. Vegetable you hate: I don't really hate any, I just don't like many.  Kidney beans?

W. What makes you run late: I used to be very very punctual, to a fault.  As I've gotten older, I don't seem to try as hard to be on time all the time.  It's all me.

X. X-Rays you’ve had: Chest. (pneumonia)  Mammograms.  Broken Arm.  The mammogram wasn't for the broken arm.

Y. Yummy food that you make: Toffee Apple Dip. 

Z. Zoo animal: I like the penguins. 

 Please copy and do this? I'd love to read about you!!

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Old Age?

I've got a problem.

I think I've forgotten how to blow my nose.

I don't have allergies or a cold or anything, but I do blow my nose a couple times a day.  (usually after showering or washing my face)  I go to blow my nose and nothing works.  My mouth closes up, weird sounds come out of my nose and nothing lands in the tissue. 

What is with that?

I've tried to think about how I taught my kids to blow their noses.  I think it went something like this, "Blow."  Well, I did put a tissue in front of their nose first...  But, I tried giving myself the same instructions and I'm still stuck.

I don't know if I've forgotten how to do it, or if my mechanics have just quit.  But, I think the snot is starting to back up into my ears.  So, now I'm a snot nosed hard of hearing forty eight year old woman who can't figure out how go get this stuff out of my nose.


Sunday, February 5, 2012

Super Bowl Sunday Randoms

So super, and so random, that we will have random words and random photos.  How about that for SUPER?

One of the nicest things about this weekend was walking the dog with the husband around midnight on Friday.  It's such a mischievous time of night!  I took a picture of this tree.  It was much more interesting in person, but I'm sharing anyway. 

I'm making chili today.  Me and the rest of the country.  My secret ingredient:  Rotel Tomatoes.

We probably won't even watch the game.  I think I burned out on football around age 35.  I'm tired of Tom Brady, FOX Sports drives me crazy, and it just doesn't interest me this year.  I wouldn't mind watching the commercials and maybe Madonna, but more than likely, I'll be watching some kind of crime show repeat.  My dad will be spinning in his grave

We leave for our Seattle/Vancouver trip in 68 days. 

We go to Auburn, Alabama in two weeks.  Yep, it's the start of college baseball season.  Missouri opens at Auburn. Let's all hope this is the year they make it to the College World Series, eh?  Go Tigers!  (Missouri, not Auburn)

I think that popcorn smells better than it tastes.  Well, except at the movie theatre.

I babysat my friend's kids this week.  One thing I really enjoyed was tucking both kids into bed.  I miss doing that with my babies.

How is the weather in your part of the world?  We've had about one cold day this winter.  I really miss having those cold winter nights.  I'm sure part of that is my increasing hot flashes, but still.  Winter needs to be winter.  Summer is always summer, we don't get a break on that one!

I'm reading, "The Art of Fielding" right now.  It is stressing me out big time.  It's a novel of self doubt and I want to get inside this book and slap a couple of these folks.  I need to finish it and get some resolution.  Sheesh.

When we went to the mountains this past time, one of the houses on the way up the hill had a couple new friends living in their front yard.  I'm thinking I want a couple of asses in my front yard. 

Happy Super Bowl Sunday Y'all!

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Mid Week Mute

  • This night my mind was filled with Halloween -- there was to be a pageant representing our county's agricultural products; I was to be a ham. Jem said he would escort me to the school auditorium. Thus began our longest journey together.

  •  Neighbours bring food with death, and flowers with sickness, and little things in between. Boo was our neighbour. He gave us two soap dolls, a broken watch and chain, a knife, and our lives. 

  • "There's a lot of ugly things in this world, son. I wish I could keep 'em all away from you. That's never possible."

  • "I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand. It's when you know you're licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what. You rarely win, but sometimes you do. Mrs Dubose won, all ninety-eight pounds of her. According to her views, she died beholden to nothing and nobody. She was the bravest person I ever knew."

  •  "You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view - until you climb into his skin and walk around in it."