Thursday, October 29, 2009

Skip To The Loo My Darling

I spend a lot of time in the bathroom.  I mean, a LOT of time.  I am sure if you examine your day, you will find that you do as well.

By the way, I'm not talking about the bathing and/or showering part of your day.  I'm talking about the bodily function that many of us don't discuss.  My bowels, and their functions, keep me hopping.  Offhand, I'd say I easily have close to three blogs I can write about this very subject.  So, if you are a loyal reader, I apologize in advance if I repeat themes.


Being a frequent bathroom user, I have developed quite the particular preference when it comes to this special room.  I understand that it is normally one of the smallest rooms in the house, but oh, how that room can make or break your day!  Here are just a few of the elements I use when rating a bathroom as good or bad.

Good Reading Materials:   I enjoy the gossip rags, clothing catalogs, or even a sports magazine.   If you are at my house, you will find a crossword puzzle and a couple photo albums in our little haven.  Bonus points to the bathroom with any of the "Uncle John's Bathroom Readers."

Bad Reading Materials:  Any kind of tool catalog, auto part magazine, auto trader.  Even worse?  No reading materials at all. 

TOILET PAPER:  This is one item of which I will never economize.  Personally, I like the Northern 3 Ply.  Many like Charmin.  I do enjoy the Charmin, but can't use it regularly, too much lint.  But, I'll take that any day, over the one ply sawdust I've been exposed to in my life.  Oh, and it must roll over, rather than under.  Ugh.  I've got problems.

Lysol:  HATE THIS STUFF.

Location of the Bathroom Within the Home:  Have you ever been to someone's house where the bathroom is directly off a main room?  Everyone sees you enter, times your stay, and pretty much knows everything you're doing in there.  The best bathroom is one down at the end of the hall, up the stairs, or even the outdated outhouse.

Door Shutability:  How horrible is the door with no lock?  Or, the door that won't quite "click" shut.  I've been in this bathroom many a time.  I pee as fast as I can, stressing the entire time that someone is going to walk in on me.  And, yes, I've had the folks walk in on me.  The only thing worse than someone walking in on me is the polite knock on the door and having to answer, "Just a minute."  Then you have that awkward exchange as you leave the room.  Argh. 

Little Soaps and Guest Towels:  I never use either of these.  I never feel like I measure up to the "guests" goods.  They look so pretty, I don't want to be the first one to disturb them!

EXTRA Toilet Paper:  I have a very huge fear of running out of TP.  (probably because this has happened in my lifetime!)  We keep many many rolls in our house.  If our stock falls below ten rolls, I break out in a sweat.  So, I always find out just where the extras are held.  The bathrooms that have them out in plain sight for me are my favorites.  Thank you Mary and Larry.

The Exhaust Fan:  I've stayed in so many hotels that do not have the exhaust fan.  Honestly, that's one of the first things we look for upon check-in.  (Yes, we are freaks!)  I love the fan.  I love its loud purring sound.  I love how it drowns out any other sound.  I love that is "exhausts." 

Have I missed anything that you have on your list?  Let's design the perfect potty!!!

8 comments:

Pete said...

Wireless access of course. What good is taking a laptop to the crapper if you can't read JuJu's blog?

sherri s. said...

Juju--we don't have to design the actual toilet because the Japanese have done it for us! Check it out:

http://www.vidavici.com/scripts/prodView.asp?idproduct=13230

We have a lower-budget version of this--heaven! Heated seat, heated water for, um, "rinsing"--love it! It's one of the first things I show off to people visiting our house for the first time. The Japanese also have, in public toilets, a sound you can turn on to hide the noise of what you're doing! Love it (also love the photo, BTW)!

JuJu said...

Oh my GOSH Sherri! A toilet with a remote control! Can I come stay with you to try it out? (and see Tallulah Mae of course)

Props to Steven for the photo. He says it reminds him of the Geico commercial! :-)

mel said...

I love it in hotels when there is a phone in the bathroom. Not that, heavens!, I would ever talk on the phone while on the toilet, but I just think it is cool. Maybe I am supposed to use it while in the tub? But then I worry about electrocution, even tho it is not possible with a phone....I think.

BTW, darlin', the paper HAS to be under....

I love having a big ol' radiator on our bathroom. Nothing modern about but towels are toasty in winter.

Ju - you do pick interesting topics!

Libby Buttons said...

I suppose a martini bar is out of the question. I love that photo you posted...to funny! Great post!
smiLes
DarLie

Unknown said...

Oh, I went to a party where the door did not lock and the whole wall between the kitchen and bath where those glass blocks that you can see a silhouette thru. I could see them perfectly so I knew they could see me-sitting! We left right after that.

Mary said...

Ju - first, thanks for the shout out! I remember you said first time you visited, that you knew we'd be good friends because our bathroom had all the fixin's.

The only think I see missing from your list is something to, um, er, 'freshen the air'. I know how you feel about matches but even those will do.

Karen Sue, I cannot believe a house like that! I am sure I would have left, too!

~Easy said...

This is one of my quirks. I could tell you here, but I wrote about it at length a while ago:
Break Like the Wind