Thursday, June 28, 2012

How to Celebrate a Birthday in the South

Go to the ATP Gun Range and Store with daughter, her boyfriend, your husband and your ex husband who happens to be daughter's dad
Turn over your license and keys
And take a quick lesson on loading and shooting a gun

Pick out a target
Take obligatory picture with the target
Make fun of all the people in the gun shop

Pose with bullets
Realize that three of four people shooting might be pretending that I'm the target
Hope this isn't an elaborate plan to "off" the Ju
Don't turn your back on anyone

Spend a bit of time thinking how much you don't like guns
Be glad YOU didn't opt to shoot
Start thinking about what's for dinner
What else would you have after shooting at the gun range?

Thank your lucky stars that you walked out of there unscathed
Pick up that there BBQ
Go to the ex's house, your former house, to eat and open presents

Whatever you do, do NOT sing "Happy Birthday," as daughter hates that song
Open pressies
Say a little prayer of Thanksgiving that your child is healthy, happy and celebrating another birthday in the South.



Lap Dog Knits said...

great idea for fun,,and happy birthday..
we have a gun
and bullets....
and no clue how to use it...

sounds like a plan for the upcoming birthday..
maybe she'll tell us what she's learned

sherri s. said...

May I just say, "Yee effin' HAW!" (I mean that in the best way! Love the photos...such a photogenic group you are! The bullets and such scare me a bit, but that's just me (and maybe you too?). Yay for birthdays, family, and CAKE!

Colleen said...

Sounds like quite the birthday! I have been here 12 years and must have been celebrating wrong all this time!

As long as you are not the one holding the target I think you are safe!