A guy I work with asked me today about separation anxiety. He asked me when does it go away? He has a 22 month old son, and lately the little fella has been having a hard time of it when saying goodbye to daddy in the morning. I looked at him, and very seriously answered, "Never."
And then they are born. We fall in love at first sight. And the worry is magnified by a million.
Then they start growing. They go to the first day of school. New worries begin. Is their teacher kind? Are they reading? Are they making friends? What about all this I hear about bullying in school? Is the bus safe? Do they eat at lunch? Reports. Homework. Projects. Worry Worry Worry. Am I doing this right?
So, I sit here with two children in college. One graduates this Saturday. Next in line for them will be adulthood, and I will still worry. I will worry if they are happy, healthy and well adjusted. How much did I screw them up? Did they find their soulmate? Did they find their dream job? How often will I see them? Did I teach them how to think, feel and be a good person? Did I tell them I loved them enough?
Because you see, we, as mothers, are never really separated. The anxiety we have if part of being a mother. It's never ending. Oh, we love our spouses, our friends, our boyfriends, our animals. But that love we have as a mother is on a different plane altogether.
And, as much as the worry stresses me, breaks my heart, and ages me, I wouldn't have it any other way. The absolute best Mother's Day gift for me, each and every year, is my two kids. Jake, Taylor, I love you both so very very much. xxx
(picture by Steven)